Dating, Romance, Trauma: What Relationships Have Become in the 21st Century?

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It is safe to say that relationships in the 21st century are quite different than they were a hundred years ago. In this blog post, we will explore some of the changes that have taken place – from how we search for love, to the role of trauma in our romantic lives.

We will look at love from both an evolutionary and biochemical perspective, and discuss how sentimental pop culture has shaped our views on relationships. We will also explore the path to self-love, and discuss what it takes to have a healthy relationship in today’s world.

Love From an Evolutionary and Biochemical Perspective

Social change in recent years has forced us to take a fresh look at many familiar phenomena, including the notion of love. Let’s look at how our perceptions of love have been influenced by the internet, social media, and the debunking of gender stereotypes.

Traditionally, when people say the word “love” they are referring to a lofty romantic feeling,  often associated with sexual desire. But from an evolutionary perspective, love is simply a survival mechanism – one that has helped our species to thrive. In his book “The Evolution of Human Attraction,” anthropologist Nigel Barber explains that the human brain is wired for attraction and that this attraction is based on cues of health and fertility.

On a biochemical level, love is also a survival mechanism. When we feel attracted to someone, our brains release a cocktail of chemicals – including dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin – that create feelings of pleasure, bonding and attachment.

So, what does all of this mean for relationships in the 21st century? Well, for one thing, it means that we are no longer limited by the same social norms and expectations that our parents and grandparents were. With the advent of the internet we can read on iPhone and social media, and we are now able to connect with people all over the world, and this has led to a more diverse range of relationships.

We are also more likely to question traditional ideas about love and relationships. For example, many people are now rejecting the idea that love should be based on looks or material possessions. Instead, they are searching for a more spiritual connection – one that goes beyond the physical.

Dating: Debunking Stereotypes and the Path to Self-Love

The way we date has also changed dramatically in recent years. With the rise of online dating and apps like Tinder, there is less stigma attached to meeting people online. This has led to a more diverse range of relationships and has also helped to debunk some of the harmful stereotypes about dating.

One of the most common misconceptions about dating is that it is all about finding someone to have sex with. This is not the case. While sexual attraction is certainly a part of dating, it is not the only thing that matters. In fact, many people are now looking for something more meaningful – a connection that goes beyond the physical.

Another common misconception about dating is that it is a competition – one where we are constantly trying to outdo each other. This is not healthy or productive. Instead, we should be focused on finding someone who makes us feel good about ourselves, and who we can share a meaningful connection with.

Sentimental Pop Culture

The diversity of relationship types is inevitably reflected in culture. Images of conventionally attractive heterosexuals who are,  Madly in love abound in popular culture, but they are not the only representations of relationships out there.

In recent years, we have seen an increase in the number of films and TV shows that focus on alternative types of relationships. For example, the hit show “Queer Eye” focuses on the friendships between five gay men, and the film “Call Me By Your Name” tells the story of a romance between two young men.

These representations are important, as they help to normalize alternative types of relationships and show that they can be just as valid and meaningful as traditional ones.

From Trauma to a Healthy Relationship

It is hard not to notice that historically, both in culture and in everyday life, relationships have been dominated by heterosexual couples. This is changing, but it has not always been easy for those in alternative relationships to find acceptance.

Yes, it’s easy to get confused about the types of relationships today, dating services are making the approach to finding a partner more pragmatic, and Instagram bloggers are still trying to sell us the pastoral picture of the patriarchal family and hinting: he who has no partner is a loser. But in spite of everything, the 21st century is gradually getting rid of these stereotypes, and we hope that in the future everyone will be able to find happiness in any form of relationship.

And if you are currently in a relationship that is not entirely healthy, remember that it is never too late to make a change. There is no shame in seeking help, and there are many resources available to those who want to build healthier relationships.


The 21st century has brought about many changes in the way we think about love and relationships. We are more open to alternative types of relationships, and we are also more likely to question traditional ideas about love. This is a positive trend, as it shows that we are becoming more accepting of diverse types of relationships.

However, there is still some work to be done in terms of debunking harmful stereotypes about dating and relationships. And, of course, we must continue to fight for the rights of those who are in alternative relationships. But overall, the 21st century is shaping up to be a more inclusive and tolerant time for love and relationships.

Do you have any thoughts on this topic? Share them in the comments below! And if you’re looking for more information on healthy relationships, be sure to check out our other blog posts. Thanks for reading!


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