There are many situations in life where you will end up asking this question of yourself. “Why am I such a loser?” It’s one of the oldest questions in the world, and the fact is that the answer varies from person to person. Usually, this question often comes to mind when your opinion of yourself continues to fall. People with a relatively low opinion of themselves often find it difficult to look up, and keep on wondering why they are such losers.
One of the things that you need to work on in life if you want to succeed is confidence. Confidence is simply the feeling that you are sure of yourself and your abilities, and that you have faith in them. If you are not confident, it’s going to show in your demeanor, in the way you talk and carry yourself, and your body language is going to change completely. Many people who are low on confidence often end up doing silly things that further exacerbate and worsen their opinion of themselves, until eventually they go into depression.
What Causes Lack of Confidence?
There are many things that can cause loss of confidence. For starters, genes and temperament both play a very important role. If you see your parents or people around you hiding from others and generally being low on confidence, it’s probably going to rub off on you, and you will feel the same. Secondly, the biggest factor that plays a role is life experiences. Numerous individual experiences play an important role in shaping up your personality, and if you have not been successful in things in life, it’s obviously going to affect your confidence.
Trauma is a major factor; people who have suffered from excessive trauma often feel a void in their life, and that affects their confidence drastically. Then, if you were bullied or harassed in your early years in school or by someone else, it’s also probably going to impact your confidence. There is no shortage of factors that can affect a person’s confidence. A person’s sexual orientation, the way their parents dealt with them, and many other factors can all combine to play a major role in their outlook of life.
Why Are You a Loser?
If you have been asking this question of yourself too often as of late, you might want to think about what you are doing. A lot of people lead their lives as spectators; they just sit on the side and let their life pass them by. Reality hits too late, and by the time they realize it, they end up losing many precious years of their life that are never going to come back.
For instance, you might be thinking of yourself as a loser because you didn’t study for an upcoming exam. Maybe it was because you were lazy, or maybe it was because you were just too occupied with other things in life. The point is, there should not be an excuse. We live in a day and age where every field is competitive, and if you are living life as a spectator, it won’t be long before it passes you by.
More importantly, you need to understand that answering this question isn’t going to be easy. You will need to ask a few hard questions of yourself. Here are a few things that you should ask of yourself, which will help you realize exactly why you are a loser.
- Do you think that you have been giving your best as of late? Do you feel that you are doing everything that you could have in the past few months?
- Where do you think your life is headed? Do you have a list of goals that you are working toward, or maybe some objectives that you want to achieve? For instance, you might want to learn a skill, or maybe work toward building your financial savings.
- Why do you think you are a loser? Is it because you feel that life handed you a bad hand, or is it because you don’t know what to do with the cards you have?
- Do you feel entitled to something that you think you are not getting? It’s probably because your concepts of entitlement are off the mark.
- Are you doing right by yourself, and those around you?
Answering these questions is more difficult than you might think. There are several ways to tell if you are a loser, and what you can do about it. Let’s get into it.
Ways to Tell If You Are a Loser
There is a small checklist that you can use to determine whether you are a loser or not. For instance, if you don’t do anything, or do very little to achieve your aims, you are a loser. Then, if your contribution to society is minimal, or nothing at all, you are a loser. More importantly, if you have to depend on others for your own happiness, you are definitely a loser.
This is a pretty small checklist, but it does give you an idea of what constitutes a loser. If you are one of these people, you need to take stock of your life, and make changes. Here are a few important things that you need to do.
Admit That You Are a Loser
The first step on the road to recovery is acceptance. You need to accept that you are a loser, and you need to write down all of the things that make you a loser. It can be anything that you feel contributes to this; it can be your lack of savings, your poor attitude in times of stress, and your behavior toward the people you love. Whatever you think makes you a loser needs to be written down on a sheet of paper. You need to admit that you have a problem; only then can you work toward improving it.
Stop blaming others for your own failures, and place the blame where it should be: on yourself. If you aren’t blaming yourself for the things that have gone wrong, you are not doing it right.
Remember, you can’t change the behavior of others around you; you can only work on yourself. That is one of the reasons why you need to tighten your belt and get ready for a massive spring cleaning of your personality and your behaviors. If you know what you are doing wrong and are able to put the blame on yourself, you will know how to fix it too.
You Are Not Special But You Can Be Special
A lot of people have a very grand perception of themselves. You need to know that you are not special, and just like others, you will have to work your way out of this hole you have dug. Once you accept this, you will know that the way to recovery is going to be long and hard, and you will need to work doubly hard to achieve what you want in life and stop being a loser,then get away from ”loser”!