Did You Start Losing Friends Once You Started Your Journey to Personal Growth?

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Personal growth is not a physical type of growth. The term refers to growing as a person, which you can do by setting goals, finding specific and detailed ways to achieve those goals, and constantly taking yourself out of your comfort zone so you can learn more about the world and grow emotionally.

The thing is, once you decide to improve your life by doing this, you might notice that some of the people you now call friends seem to be deserting you, which can be a little disconcerting.

If this has been happening to you, don’t panic because you’re not alone. Still, there are things you can do about it that aren’t as difficult as you might think.

Did You Start Losing Friends When Focusing on Personal Growth?

Many people do, in fact, start to lose friends when they decide to focus on personal growth. For most people, focusing on personal growth is a great way to feel more fulfilled with life and become much happier as a result.

If you love starting this journey and you’re wondering why your friends seem to be deserting you, it could be due to one of the following reasons:

1.  You Have Outgrown Them

Let’s face it, not everyone is going to be happy with your personal growth decision. Some friends will even feel threatened because they themselves are not brave enough to do what you’ve decided to do, and that can cause some resentment.

As a result, they’ll start pulling away from you emotionally, which can be very disappointing.

If you’ve been friends with this person for many decades, this is even more likely to happen simply because you’re changing and they expect you to remain the same. The longer you know someone, the more likely this is the reason you’re losing them.

2.  Their Values Are Different

Occasionally, your friends may simply not be interested in personal growth themselves because their values aren’t the same as yours. This can happen whether you’ve known them for a short time or for many years, but it centers around one thing – their likes and dislikes, interests and turn-offs are just different from yours.

Unfortunately, once their values change, they may decide to end the friendship because they often feel like the two of you are going in opposite directions.

3.  They Can Become Toxic

Occasionally, this will happen, and it’s normally due to jealousy or envy, or even because they’re trying to manipulate you so that you’ll do the same things they’re doing; in other words, so that you don’t pass them up in the area of personal growth. This can even cause them to become bitter and angry, which might mean that ending the friendship is your smartest option.

It’s especially good to end the friendship if they become so jealous and angry that they’re no longer able to make you feel good to be around them. No one deserves that.

4.  They No Longer Have Anything in Common With You

If you continue your personal growth journey and you grow a lot in a short period of time, you might wake up one day and discover that you and your friend no longer have anything in common. Suddenly, you and your friend no longer have any of the same interests and hobbies, and this can negatively affect the friendship.

This is a hard one to overcome because the two of you may still care about one another, but without anything in common, it’s difficult to keep the friendship going.

5.  It Is Time to Move Ahead

Unfortunately, sometimes friendships run their course and it is simply time to move on and get new friends. This often happens unexpectedly out of nowhere, but it’ll be easy to recognize. It doesn’t mean you have to despise one another from that point on, but it does usually mean that you aren’t close friends anymore.

This can happen whether you’re growing or not, but incidents such as this can often speed up the process.

Is There Anything You Can Do About These Things?

You can’t always do something about these problems, but if you make the decision early on to involve your friends as much as possible, things might not turn out as bleak as you think. Anytime you take a step in a direction that is unfamiliar to you, let your friends know about it, and have patience with them if they don’t understand it.

In the end, it will take both of you to keep the friendship going. You deserve to grow and thrive and continuously learn new things, but it’s a good idea to share this adventure with your friends as much as possible. As long as they’re not caught blindsided so they aren’t sure what hit them, the friendship has a chance to survive.

Nevertheless, there may come a day when you realize that you need to seek out new friends, so this should always be in the back of your mind as a possibility.


You almost certainly will lose at least one friend if you’ve decided you want to concentrate on your personal growth so you can enjoy your life more. This is not that uncommon. It is mostly due to them not understanding what you’re doing or simply not agreeing with it. They may even be intimidated by your brave decision but not want to go along for the ride.

If you stay open and honest with them like you did before your journey started, it may help you keep many more of those friends.


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